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Monday 22k cycle

Quick spin on zwift. Did 20k in 36 minutes and a 2k/4 minute warm up.

Nice little spin. In isolation not much but good to get back in the swing of 2x per days.

Rode in London. Did the flat route. Boring to ride it alone. Rode steady. 193 average watts doesn’t really tell the story. Suspect the first 10 minutes were at 150 and the balance of the remainder were above 200.

Did the ride while my son watched voltron. Pretty good to remember that I can always get a short ride in while my son watches TV.

Tomorrow will be a debacle with all the rain and then it is my son’s b day. Only way to work out is to do an hour in the morning. Terrible track record doing that. Fingers crossed.

That is all for now…

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Back at it

So. 2 weeks off gave me lots of time to think. Not just about work but more importantly about what I’m doing physically.

Generally, I’m pleased (and a tiny bit proud) of everything I’ve been doing and have done (since 2010). It’s not easy to do this day in and day out with family, kids, work, etc going on but for the most part I’ve stuck to it and I’m mentally stronger and more physically fit as a result.

However, there are issues. Mental and physical. I don’t have great body image and I stress about it. I use the sledgehammer of physical activity to bludgeon negative thoughts (instead of dealing with their root cause) and I’m doing a hell of a lot of very imbalanced activity.

I strongly question where all of the activity is going and how long I can continue this way. Yet, I strongly desire to stay physically fit so that I can be healthy as I age and so that I can be physical and active with my children as they age.

So what do I want to do.

First. I want to focus on intake and balance. I want to eat less junk and put less hard to digest food into me. I want to do some kind of weight bearing exercises a minimum of 2x per week (3 would be ideal). Even if just for 15 minutes. Anything will be better than my current situation.

Second. I want to channel my efforts towards my desired goals. Meaning, I’m not interested in running a race. I’m only marginally interested in running and only do it so much because I can’t get the fitness outside of cycling season otherwise. I am interested in riding my bike far on a trip. I am interested in going places on my bike. That is what I should be focusing on.

Third. I want to improve my self image and stress management systems. I don’t want to bludgeon myself into exhausted submission. I want to deal with the reason why the issues/thoughts/stress originate in the first place. I understand how to approach the stress. I know I need to find a degree of acceptance with myself and be less self conscious and insecure image wise.

So what does all this mean. I want to eat better. Exercise slightly different. Focus on what inspires me physically right now. Better manage the external (and internal) factors that cause me stress. Better manage my self image and accept myself differently.

What is the action plan. I’m stuck with running for a while longer (and I don’t want to fully stop the way I did last summer), I want to do a short floor routine 2-3x per week (not Fri or Sunday because it won’t happen). I want to appreciate my off days. I want to eat less junk food, drink less, and eat my fish/seafood (vs red meat).

I want to look at routes/etc and find ways of planning weekend summer excursions that allow me so ride my bike to where we are going (port hope, Collingwood, Niagara, prince Edward county, etc) and then I need to get other people interested so that I’m not alone.

Quite the post. Definitely searching for a renewed direction. Hope I get to a good “place”.

That is all for now…

Monday am 6k

Took 2 weeks off. Was great. 1st week was vacation and the second week was merely struggling to get back on my routine. Vacation was so nice. Just hung out with the family, swam 2x per day, monkeyed around with the kids and enjoyed not being in winter.

Run was fine. In shorts. Only 6k. Should have done 8k. Ugh. Need to get back on the 8k horse.

Didn’t see anyone or anything. It is a stat holiday today and Toronto is still sleeping.

Bit of a screwy week given the impending biblical rain. Will likely have to zwift a bunch and scoop single runs when the rain isn’t super hard. Sad that whenever it gets warm in the winter it is always accompanied by biblical rain.

Feeling chubby. I definitly gained weight last week. But it’s OK. I’ll hunker down and burn it off. Only 6-8 weeks of pure running weather left. Then I can start getting back on the bike (I gave one of my bikes a spring clean yesterday).

I’d love to run home today. Not sure what will happen due to the rain. Will have to see.

That is all for now…

Friday am 6k

Skipped yesterday. Up past 4am re work and then had the worst most disillusioning day in probably 10 years. Absolute failure at a very high level.

Anyways.

In bed by 9 and slept to 7am. Woke up worried that I forgot to set my alarm (I had forgot) only to find that I woke up at the time the alarm would have otherwise gone off. Funny. Sad.

Ran in. Minus 20 with the wc. Cold. But fine. Run was fine. Felt better Tha previous runs this week. Likely due to having had a day off.

Didn’t see much going on. Moon was massive and high in the western sky. Was kind of cool.

Not running home. Hope to zwift tomorrow.

That is all for now…

Wednesday am 6k

Real issues this morning. Woke up in a start. Couldn’t perform basic tasks like putting on a shirt properly. Definitely a bit of a debacle.

Run wasn’t good. Just slogged through it. Happy to be done. Had discomfort in both feet at times – different forms of discomfort though.

Feeling as though I’m in need of a major dump but nothing. The GI issues from last night seemingly turned to concrete. Ugh.

Didn’t see much on my run. Grey brown and ugly with the exception of an absolutely brilliant sunrise. Gorgeous.

Yesterday was such a bad day. Not sure how else to put it. Simply brutal. Hope today isn’t similar or worse.

Hope to do a 6k home. If I do it will be my 40th activity this month. That is a lot.

That is all for me….

Wednesday pm 6k

Bad day. Left late.

Over dressed for run. Dropped a layer along the way on my extremities.

Didn’t see much on the way home. Just a shit lonely run.

40th workout this month. Most ever. Don’t see the result but I will eventually if I keep it up.

Kind-of crazy. I’m shocked.

Really upset about work – can’t really focus on this.

Plan is to run a double tomorrow. A single on Friday and to zwift on Saturday. Will see what happens.

That is all for now…

Tuesday pm 6k

Worked late. Long brutal day. As expected.

Ran home. Cold. Dark. Cold. Mixed traction. Minor GI issues in the last 2km. Of course – now that I’m done, nothing. Ugh.

Run was fine. Not fast or slow. Just a run. Feeling a bit chubby again. No reason for it and frankly it (the chubby feeling) can fuck off. I’m sick of the mental cost of monitoring it. It – meaning I – will be what it is based on what I’m doing. That is it.

That is all for now…